quinta-feira, 12 de fevereiro de 2009

Background

Porque nos decepcionamos com uma pessoa, com um acontecimento, com uma situação, com a vida?
A decepção é um sentimento tão frustante, talvez seja das sensações que mais me entristece, me deita abaixo, me impede de continuar, me bloqeia.
Será que criamos expectativas altas demais? Ou será que as expectativas eram normais, próprias e adequadas, mas a decepção teimosamente nos bate à porta?
Será um problema de ansiedade, de querermos que tanto se realize, que tanto aconteça?
Será que somos exigentes demais, e exigimos dos outros, coisas que nem nós próprios sabemos fazer?
Será que uns são mais atreitos a decepções que outros?
Será que uns, nem percebem a decepção não lhe dando a importância que outros lhe dão?
Será que as decepções só acontecem aos emotivos? Aos frágeis? Aos corajosos? Aos exagerados? Aos idiotas?
E acordar depois de uma decepção?
Acordar para a Vida, acordar para o Dia, pôr os pés fora da cama, levantar o corpo, calçar qualquer coisa para começar a pisar o chão, a terra, olharmo-nos no espelho, olhar uns olhos decepcionados,….
Reagir…. Como se faz para Re Agir? Reagir é voltar a agir! Para voltar a agir, é preciso ter vontade de agir. E o mundo que nos rodeia, exigente, que não tolera a insatisfação, não tolera tristezas, que como uma criança mimada, quer-nos Lindos, Contentes, Sorrizinhos, Arranjados, Elegantes, Perfeitos, e todos nos pedem, “Vá reage, faz qualquer coisa, tens de melhorar! Lá estás tu com o teu pessimismo!…”. E para culminar, lá dizem a frase: “Não percebo, porque ficas assim, não é caso para isso!”. E nós, envolvidos num manto negro de tristeza, de amargos na boca, de nós no estomâgo, de dedos das mãos frios, de joelhos ligeiramente a quebrar, ficamos perplexos a olhar para aquela gente que nos diz “Que não é nada!”. Não é nada???! Mas não percebem, que para nós É TUDO!Que houve uma derrocada de terras, por cima da nossa boca, que houve uma inundação de líquidos salgados, que nos deixou molhados de suores frios, que o nosso coração saltou, mexeu-se, como se de um sismo se tratasse e nos deixou com taquicárdia, que houve um corte a meio dos nossos pulmões, e os pôs a trabalhar em limites mínimos, que sentimos o sangue a parar nas veias e que fomos invadidos por um vento frio e quente, que levantou todas as areias no ar que nos sufocam e nos cegam? Pois, não vêem isto?Faltam as lágrimas? Ah, as lágrimas, as piegas lágrimas, que comovem os outros….. Mas olhem, os decepcionados não choram por fora, choram por dentro! Choram, choram, choram, até ficar secos, como um solo africano, seco, ressequido, morto….

Deixem-nos enterrar uma decepção, como se de um corpo morto se tratasse, deixem-nos enviuvar, chorar aquilo que nunca acontecerá, que nunca iremos possuir, deixem-nos cair no chão (não nos levantem, por favor!), de pernas e braços abertos deixem-nos gritar, gritar muito para que saiam os espíritos malígnos que nos envenenam, deixem-nos enlouquecer, perder o juízo, falar sozinhos, deixem-nos sair para a rua de roupão e chinelos como uma velha senil, deixem-nos estar sós.

(Foda-se o "novo português, só me lembro que microondas agora se escreve micro-ondas)

Meus filhos irão saber o que é decepção, assim como todos nós, mas dói em saber que um dia eles irão chorar por isso sem saber se ao menos vale a pena.
Minha vida é de uma felicidade só, rodeada por homens que amo, pelas minhas famílias, Campagnollo's, Detofano's, Farina's, fico eternamente agradecida por tudo.

Devo fotos a amigos queridos e tão lembrados no meu dia-dia doméstico, mas prometo não demorar a envia-las e a mandar notícias.
É como dizia Vínicius: "A gente não faz amigos, reconhece-os."

Thank you

35 comentários:

Adele Corners disse...

Assim ó: decepções são mais comuns que acertos. E nossos problemas sempre são maiores e mais importantes, obviamente, pq são nossos. É lógico.

E infelizmente a gente não consegue proteger quem ama de tudo de ruim que pode acontecer.

O máximo é estar sempre por perto, seja pra ajudar a levantar, seja pra se jogar no chão e gritar junto.

Tô aí, tu sabe.

Bjs

Rochele disse...

Decepções fazem parte de nossas vidas.
O melhor é deixar a decepção "doer" por um tempo e depois dar a volta por cima. Tirar a tal da lição da história toda (mesmo sabendo que em alguns casos não tem lição nem moral nenhuma) e tentar estar preparada para próxima.
E quanto aos teus pequenos, sim eles vão se decepcionar, irão sofrer e cair. Mas a super mãe deles vai estar por perto para aliviar a dor. Não evitar a decepção que isso é importante para crescer, mas dar apoio e ensinar a trilhar o melhor caminho.

Ogra Albina Orelha de Elfo disse...

Ia falar um monte de coisas mas a Cíntia e a Chele já falaram tudo...
Saudades....



Meme pra ti no meu blog.

Paulo disse...

Sim, aos olhos dos outros nunca é motivo suficiente. Só quem está sentindo é que sabe. E isso nos basta.

Preocupado contigo. Com saudades também.

Beijos!

laine. disse...

é mais ou menos como em "Desventuras em Série":

Fica dificil enxergar que o problema dos outros é maior quando se está olhando para a própria espinha medonha...

Saudade.

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